It's like there was this crazy rush in December - all the focus was on preparing for Christmas, adapting plans to coincide with the latest, ever-changing covid rules. It was intense, focused a mission completed.
Then there was January - a month known for its "blues" but with the chaos of distance school learning January was insane, every day felt like the same long battle of trying to co-ordinate devices, internet access and schoolwork - at times we had 3 live meetings on the go at the same time with Blake's year 7 meaning his love lesson has up to 180 students, Meg's year 5 live lessons grew from 30 to 60 participant where one teacher was off and then there was my husband on his live calls too. My days were spent rushing around - literally feeling like I was pulled in every direction making sure everyone was logged onto the right thing at the right time, both children heavily relying on my assistance to be able to do the work. and of course keeping everyone quiet whilst hubby was working from home - including the puppy.
If I'm brutally honest, January felt really low for me, we the worry of an elderly relative in hospital and my sister's pregnancy, to the fear of people getting ill - I find it hard not to panic on the days hubby has to go into London (once or twice a week) with the heavy restrictions it sometimes feels like we are just surviving, it doesn't really feel like life all that much sometimes. I have a reoccurring nightmare which I get at moments of stress and its just waking me up most nights at the moment. I know I'm not really ok but the important thing is that I know I will be!
February started with the best of news - we have a new niece! Niece number 7 (and 2 nephews) I feel blessed to have such a lovely large family and so many nieces and nephews to fuss over - It's just frustrating that it would be a 12 hour round trip to see her (and lets face it, I'd be terrified of going near a newborn right now!)